Unique eyes open

Today, for the first time in years, I felt pretty. Not because anyone told me, not because I finally looked like a model and not because I’ve covered myself in layers of makeup. I just looked in the mirror and was shocked to find I didn’t hate what I saw, in fact I liked what I saw. I could look past the flaws that were hiding a beauty, no they had a beauty of their own. My eyes were no longer an odd color, they were unique and mysterious. Looking back at me was a survivor, someone who’s to be appreciated. Sure I’m not perfect and not everyone will think I’m beautiful, but as long as I can appreciate myself I’ll survive the imperfection.

This girl had always stood on the other side of the mirror but I couldn’t see her, I’d see a distorted Image as if the lense of the camera was smudged. I strived for perfection and to be normal, but that was never a realistic goal. I think now that I’m learning to accept myself I can spend the energy normally wasted on things that work towards the future, together with my newfound me. I wonder of this is how other people had seen me all along, but that doesn’t really matter right now.

Anouk S Borsboom

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